Anong pinagkapareho ni Enchong Dee sa Puerto...
beben-eleben: Pareho silang Princesa at pareho silang CONFIRMED!
Philippine Mythology (Visayas)
Eto yung link ng nauna kong post tungkol sa Mitolohiyang Pilipino. Maraming lugar dito sa Pilipinas kaya siguradong maraming sinasambang espiritu o diyus-diyosan. Maaari ring ang mga Diyus-diyosang ito ay nagpapalit lamang ng aspeto sa iba’t ibang lugar, tulad ng sa Mitolohiyang Griyego-Romano, na nagbabago ang mga Greek gods sa warlike Roman gods. Eto ang mga listahan ng mga Diyus-diyosan...
Mitolohiyang Pilipino (Tagalog)
blizzard14: Alam mo yung Greek Mythology, Roman Mythology, Egyptian Myth at Hindu Myth, pero alam mo ba yung Mitolohiyang Pilipino? Magandang pag-aralan ang mga sinaunang diyus-diyosang sinasamba ng ating mga ninuno. Narito ang mga iilan sa mga Diyus-diyosang sinasamba ng mga Tagalog Bathala - Siya ang Kataas-taasang Diyos ng Katagalugan. Siya ang tinatawag na Poong Maykapal noon. Ang Visayan...
beben-eleben: Magboyfriend naglalakad sa park… GF: Hon, ihi muna ako. BF: Dyan ka na lang sa damuhan. Habang umiihi, kinapkap ni BF ang legs ni GF nang may mahawakan syang mahaba sa gitna nito. Read More
Kapag narinig mo ang salitang BEKI
beben-eleben: Noon: Ngayon:
Star Wars (Office Edition)
beben-eleben: At first I was like ANAKIN SKYWALKER: But I realize my pillow makes me QUEEN AMIDALA:
Miss Universe Q&A portion
Judge: Contestant # 2, your question is, if ignorance is bliss, would you still seek knowledge? and why.
Contestant # 2: Thank you for that beautiful and extremely staggering question, and with that, I consider myself as 4th runner up. Thank you.
BF: Hon, sinapak ko ung nakasalubong ko knina! Badtrip, sabihin ba naman na mukha akong magsasaka pag katabi kita!
GF: Sabi nya un? hihi (blush) wag ka na magalit hon, marangal naman ang magsasaka. Bakit nya ba un sinabi?
BF: Kasi mukha ka daw CARABAO!
GF: Asan na yang HAYUUP NA YUN!!! ASAAAN!!!
When people talk about Tumblr in public...
6 Types of Maid
beben-eleben: 1. Obedient: Nakahanda na po ako sir… …ng pagkain. 2. Polite: Luluhod na po ba ako sir… …para ma bless ang food? 3. Careful: Dahan-dahan naman po sir… …baka mabasag ang plato. 4. Emo: Ang sakit naman sir… …ng sinabi ninyo. 5. Addict: Ang sarap sir! Sige pa! …Sana, araw-araw ganito lagi ang ulam natin! 6. Concerned: Bilisan mo sir. Darating na po si ma’am… …Sigurado gutom na ‘yon!
Pork and Beans
Nanay: Bumili ka ng pork and beans.
Boy (ngo-ngo): Omo (opo).
Boy: Ani, ngamuta o ayo? (Ali, kumusta po kayo?)
Ate: Ok lang. Anong bibilhin mo?
Boy: Mo en men (Pork and beans)
Ate: Hindi ko gets.
Boy: O ige, netter Mi as in Minimines (o sige, letter P as in Philippines)
Boy: Mi! (Kumanta)...ey, mi, ni, ni, e, em, nye...en, em, en, o mi! (P! …A , B , C , D, E , F , G …. L , M , N , O P !)
Ate: Ah P. Ituloy mo.
Boy: Mi, ngo! (P , O!)
Ate: Letter O, tapos?
Boy: Netter Arng (Letter R )
Ate: Ah P - O - R, malapit na!
Boy: Oo! Mo en men. Unod ngey. (Oo! Pork & beans, Sunod K)
Ate: Letter A?
Boy: Ini ho, ngey (Hindi ho, K)
Ate: Alam ko na. Pork and beans!
Boy: Oo! Mo en men (Oo! Pork and beans)
Ate: Ay naku! WALA... HAHAHAHA
Only the Japanese.. →
the-absolute-funniest-posts: ^Not sure what that is. ^Vertigo soothing glasses ^10-in-1 Gardening tool Umbrella headband The noodle eaters hair guard ROFL THE LAST ONE OMG Following this blog may be the greatest thing you have ever done HAHAHAHAHA
If Famous Writers Had Written Twilight…
Herman Merville: “Call me Bella.” A tome about the length of the original series investigates Bella’s monomanical search for the vampire who stole her virginity. There’s an entire chapter devoted to describing the devastating whiteness of Edward’s skin, and several on the physiognomy of vampires, starting with their skeletal structure outward.
Virginia Woolf: The novel takes place over the course of twenty four hours, during which Bella is painting a portrait of Edward and reflecting on how her femininity circumscribes her role within 20th century society.
Jane Austen: Basically the same as the original, except that Bella is socially apt and incredibly witty. Her distrust of Edward is initially bourne out of a tragic misunderstanding of his character, but after a fling with Jacob during which he sexually assaults her (amusing to no one in this version) she and Edward live happily ever after.
Ernest Hemingway: Edward and Bella exchange terse dialogue alluding to Edward’s anatomical problem. Eventually, Bella leaves him for Jacob, a local bullfighter with a giant…sense of entitlement.
Ayn Rand: Edward tells Bella that he intends to stop saving her life, unless she starts paying him in gold bullion. Hatefucking ensues, then Jacob spouts objectivist philosophy for the next 100 pages.
HP Lovecraft: Edward cannot reconcile his own horror at becoming a vampire. He rapes and kills Bella but attributes it to the desires of an ancient Deity outside our power to understand. Everyone thinks it’s ok because he calls his devil by a cutesy name.
Haruki Murakami: Bella has sex with Edward, who is half a ghost. Jacob is a talking cat. Most of the prose is given over to descriptions of Bella making pasta.
Douglas Adams: Bella is the last of a discontinued series of robots made to emulate the now extinct human race. She whines gears and randomly pouts moronic gibberish while falling over. She is accompanied on her travels across the cosmos by Edward, a sparkly giant space banana and Jacob, a small wooden box of doom.
Dan Brown: Bella is a famous scientist who specializes in folklore. She is contacted by Edward, an old and well respected friend who is an expert in history, indicating that someone has been murdered in Forks. When there he is greeted by Jacob who acts as her guide to the new town. They have an intimate relation as they track the mysterious “cold ones”. With Edward's help they are led on a wild goose chase only to realize that he was responsible for the murder in the first place.
Chuck Palahniuk: Bella, who is never explicitly named, carries on relationships with both Jacob and Edward who are actually both alter-egos of the guy who almost hit her with his car in the first book. The entire book is written in diary format from the point of view of her spleen.
J.K Rowling: Jacob, Edward and Bella are best friend throughout their schooling years while hormones flair and they defeat evil forces. Bella continuously rages and scolds against Edward for being emotionally inaccessible while Jacob awkwardly tags along as the third wheel even though he’s the main character.
Terry Pratchett: Bella is a troll from the mountains who falls in love with Edward, a charming, handsome assassin. They have various adventures in a parallel universe until Jacob, who is Edward in the future, disrupts everything by being heir to the throne. Bella nearly dies but is saved by Edward/Jacob + a comical, mythical ingredient. Instead of 4 books there are 103.
Neil Gaiman: The story begins with a song. Then the song creates the world. Then major, minor and demi-gods appear. A hero’s journey in hell occurs, with Edward starring as the brooding, pissed off vampire who can’t drink blood because of a spell and must go to hell to break the spell. A duel of philosophical/existential dimensions ensue. Somebody gets swallowed up in a vagina. Edward saves the world by singing.
Stieg Larsson: A tale of political conspiracy that reads like a cross between The X Files and Sucker Punch.
Message me one name and I'll answer any of the...
always-a-time: Harry Potter - Tell about a scar on your body. Ron Weasley - Something you’re afraid of. Hermione Granger - A subject you know a lot about. Draco Malfoy - Closest green item to you. Rubeus Hagrid - Your favorite animal. Luna Lovegood - Something about you other people find weird. Neville Longbottom - Your favorite flower. Nymphodora Tonks - Something you would change about...
Umuwi na ang Nanay mong namalengke
beben-eleben: Expectation: “Pasaluboooooong!” Reality: “O ano, nakapaglinis ka na?”
The “7L” that created “LIFE”
beben-eleben: Love. Lust. Laugh. Lie. Lose. Loss. Lessons.
I love how all the fandoms are mourning with me...
The Whovians The Disney Fandom The Sherlockians And oh gosh the Harry Potter fandom
charmspeakme: SOPA EMERGENCY LIST. in-s4nity: dirtyredsdirtymind: SOPA Emergency IP list: So if these ass-fucks in DC decide to ruin the internet, here’s how to access your favorite sites in the event of a DNS takedown tumblr.com 18.104.22.168 wikipedia.org 22.214.171.124 # News bbc.co.uk 126.96.36.199 aljazeera.com 188.8.131.52 #...
If SOPA passes here are ways to access sites....
justjoshhn: cunt-a-saurus-rex: Here is how to access sites in the event of a DNS takedown. Tumblr: 184.108.40.206/dashboard Facebook: 220.127.116.11 Twitter: 18.104.22.168 LiveJournal: 22.214.171.124 Wikipedia: 126.96.36.199 Reddit: 188.8.131.52 Google: 184.108.40.206 Youtube: 220.127.116.11 Hotmail: 18.104.22.168 OMG! SPREAD IT!
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Plato: For the greater good.
Karl Marx: It was a historical inevitability.
Machiavelli: So that its subjects will view it with admiration, as a chicken which has the daring and courage to boldly cross the road, but also with fear, for whom among them has the strength to contend with such a paragon of avian virtue? In such a manner is the princely chicken's dominion maintained.
Hippocrates: Because of an excess of light pink gooey stuff in its pancreas.
Jacques Derrida: Any number of contending discourses may be discovered within the act of the chicken crossing the road, and each interpretation is equally valid as the authorial intent can never be discerned, because structuralism is DEAD, DAMMIT, DEAD!
Thomas de Torquemada: Give me ten minutes with the chicken and I'll find out.
Timothy Leary: Because that's the only kind of trip the Establishment would let it take.
Douglas Adams: Forty-two.
Nietzsche: Because if you gaze too long across the Road, the Road gazes also across you.
Oliver North: National Security was at stake.
B.F. Skinner: Because the external influences which had pervaded its sensorium from birth had caused it to develop in such a fashion that it would tend to cross roads, even while believing these actions to be of its own free will.
Carl Jung: The confluence of events in the cultural gestalt necessitated that individual chickens cross roads at this historical juncture, and therefore synchronicitously brought such occurrences into being.
Jean-Paul Sartre: In order to act in good faith and be true to itself, the chicken found it necessary to cross the road.
Ludwig Wittgenstein: The possibility of "crossing" was encoded into the objects "chicken" and "road", and circumstances came into being which caused the actualization of this potential occurrence.
Albert Einstein: Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road crossed the chicken depends upon your frame of reference.
Aristotle: To actualize its potential.
Buddha: If you ask this question, you deny your own chicken-nature.
Howard Cosell: It may very well have been one of the most astonishing events to grace the annals of history. An historic, unprecedented avian biped with the temerity to attempt such an herculean achievement formerly relegated to homo sapien pedestrians is truly a remarkable occurence.
Salvador Dali: The Fish.
Darwin: It was the logical next step after coming down from the trees.
Emily Dickinson: Because it could not stop for death.
Epicurus: For fun.
Ralph Waldo Emerson: It didn't cross the road; it transcended it.
Johann von Goethe: The eternal hen-principle made it do it.
Ernest Hemingway: To die. In the rain.
Werner Heisenberg: We are not sure which side of the road the chicken was on, but it was moving very fast.
David Hume: Out of custom and habit.
Jack Nicholson: 'Cause it [censored] wanted to. That's the [censored] reason.
Pyrrho the Skeptic: What road?
Ronald Reagan: I forget.
John Sununu: The Air Force was only too happy to provide the transportation, so quite understandably the chicken availed himself of the opportunity.
The Sphinx: You tell me.
Mr. T.: If you saw me coming you'd cross the road too!
Henry David Thoreau: To live deliberately ... and suck all the marrow out of life.
Mark Twain: The news of its crossing has been greatly exaggerated.
Molly Yard: It was a hen!
Zeno of Elea: To prove it could never reach the other side.
Chaucer: So priketh hem nature in hir corages.
Wordsworth: To wander lonely as a cloud.
The Godfather: I didn't want its mother to see it like that.
Keats: Philosophy will clip a chicken's wings.
Blake: To see heaven in a wild fowl.
Dr. Johnson: Sir, had you known the Chicken for as long as I have, you would not so readily enquire, but feel rather the Need to resist such a public Display of your own lamentable and incorrigible Ignorance.
Mrs. Thatcher: This chicken's not for turning.
Supreme Soviet: There has never been a chicken in this photograph.
Oscar Wilde: Why, indeed? One's social engagements whilst in town ought never expose one to such barbarous inconvenience - although, perhaps, if one must cross a road, one may do far worse than to cross it as the chicken in question.
Kafka: Hardly the most urgent enquiry to make of a low-grade insurance clerk who woke up that morning as a hen.
Swift: It is, of course, inevitable that such a loathsome, filth-ridden and degraded creature as Man should assume to question the actions of one in all respects his superior.
Macbeth: To have turned back were as tedious as to go o'er.
Whitehead: Clearly, having fallen victim to the fallacy of misplaced concreteness.
Freud: An die andere Seite zu kommen. (Much laughter.)
Hamlet: That is not the question.
Donne: It crosseth for thee.
Pope: It was mimicking my Lord Hervey.
Constable: To get a better view.
Yeats: She was following the Faeries that sang to her to come away with them from the dull, bucolic comfort of the farmyard to the waters and the wild.
Shelley: 'Tis a metaphor for the pursuits of man: though 'twas deemed an extraordinary occurrence at the time, still it brought little to bear on the great scheme of time and history, and was ultimately fruitless and forgotten.
Tolkien: Chickens are respectable folk, and well thought of. They never go on any adventures or do anything unexpected. One fine spring day, as the chicken wandered contentedly around the farmyard, clucking and pecking and enjoying herself immensely, there appeared a Wizard and thirteen Dwarves who were in need of a chicken to share in their adventure. Reluctantly she joined their party, and with them crossed the road into the great Unknown, muttering about how rude the Dwarves were to take her away on such short notice, without even giving her time to brush her feathers or fetch her hat.
Reblog with your name and adding "ski" on end
beben-eleben: When you’re a baby: When you’re a kid: When you’re a teen: When you’re an adult:
Anonymous asked: ano po yung TTH ?